Crumbled Papers
by SpicyPepper-SweetSugar
Summary: "She was going to tell him. She was going to tell him, right now." Olicity, slightly AU! WARNING: This is firstly and foremost a sad and angsty fic, involving a terminal disease and lots of heartbreak. (You need to know this before you start reading, I suppose.) Reviews are gold! Rated T, because.
1. Revelation

_**A/N: Hey! This is my first Olicity story! Originally it was posted on Tumblr as a drabble, but I decided to post it here too because of the good response it got! Hopefully, those of you who haven't read it yet will like it too! Also, it is kind of AU, so if you don't like that, then I'm sorry.**_

_**Yet another thing I need to say is that this had the POSSIBILITY to become a multi-chapter "drabble" collection, but only if you like it! And I have a lot of school work going on currently, so I'm not sure when I'll be able to update, so I'm not making any promises!**_

_**Share your thoughts! Reviews are always welcome! :)**_

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"**Crumbled papers"**

**Chapter 1/? **

**W****ord count: ****1484**

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She was going to tell him.

She was going to tell him, _right now_.

Felicity licked her lips subconsciously as she stood up from her desk, pushing her chair back slightly as she started toward his office. She stopped again and almost ran back to the security of her chair and turned to face the computer, biting her lip. Glancing over at him through the glass wall that separated their offices, she could see that he was deeply concentrated in his own work. Something inside of her was glad that he had failed to notice her and her indecisive movements. Her hand reached down in her recycling bin, and she picked up the paper she had crumbled just a few moments ago.

She tried to flatten it against the surface, but failed, because once paper is crumbled, it can never go back to the way it was.

That was how she felt at the moment; crumbled. Learning Oliver's secret and joining the now named "Team Arrow" had crumbled her, in a completely figurative way. Just like the paper, she couldn't go back to the way she was before she had joined the team, but at the moment, she wished she could do just that. It wasn't that she was blaming him for what stood on the paper, because that would just be..._not right_.

She pushed the glasses up on her nose and pulled back her hair behind her ear, before pulling it back up in the front. Her fingers were twitching and she knew that she had to tell him before the end of the day, because it wouldn't be fair if she continued to lead him and Diggle on. She had known for about two weeks now, and every time she tried to get around to telling them, she chickened out. Perhaps it was because she was afraid that if she told them, it would be official.

Once again, she stood up and headed over to Oliver's office. This time she reached the door before stopping, her hand on the handle. As she watched him signing some papers, her breath left her lungs. He was so deeply concentrated that he hadn't even lifted his head to see her standing there on the other side of the glass. She took a step back, releasing the handle as she inhaled sharply once more. She wasn't ready.

Turning on her heel, and starting to walk back to her desk, she stopped when she heard Oliver's voice behind her, "Felicity?"

Shutting her eyes tightly at the sudden pain in her stomach which appeared when she heard him say her name in that _very_ special tone, she froze for a solid of three seconds before recovering and turning to face him.

"Yeah?"

"Are you going to come inside or are you going to walk back and forth all day?"

The question took her aback. So he _had _noticed.

"Yeah," she said again, walking back toward him. She slipped past him into his office. He closed the door and she heard the _click_ as the lock was turned, which made her fingers tremble slightly. What was the point of having a glass wall between them, if anyone could walk into her part of the office and see them? She tried to cover up her trembling by clasping her fingers together in front of her as he walked toward his desk. He didn't sit down though, only leaned against the table, and deep inside, Felicity had a feeling that it might have to do with the fact that he wanted them to be on equal ground. If he sat in the chair, he would be Oliver Queen, her boss, but standing up, leaning slightly against the desk, made him Oliver, her… Well.

"What's on your mind?" he asked her, his tone soft. "You haven't really been yourself these past weeks." It was clear that he was trying not to sound worried, but she knew deep down that he was. Ever since she found out, she had tried to avoid speaking to both him and Diggle as much as possible. When she spoke, it was always about work and whenever they tried to get her to tell them how she was feeling, she shut them down with more computer speech.

The look in Oliver's eyes, however, told her that there was no shutting down this time.

"Where is Diggle?" she asked, the habit of changing the subject making its way through again.

"What's on your mind, _Felicity_?" he repeated, and this time, there was something about the way he said her name.

She bit her lip and turned around, not being able to look at him. "I wanted to tell you guys," she began. "It's just not easy to...get the words out. I want John to be here too."

"Whatever it is, I'm sure you can fill him in on it later," Oliver said from behind her. He was still by his desk from what she could hear.

"I'm not sure…" _I can handle saying it twice_, she finished in her mind.

"Felicity," Oliver breathed out, "are you all right?"

A lump formed in her throat and she tried to swallow it down as she turned around to face him. "I'm not sure I can do this anymore, Oliver," she finally said, her voice trembling.

"What?" Oliver asked, looking genuinely surprised.

"I want to quit," she clarified, the lump in her throat still there.

"Quit you daily job or…?"

"Both," she said, her voice determined this time.

A lot of emotions flashed through his eyes as she finally met them, but she couldn't quite describe any of them because of the speed that they had disappeared. "Why?" was all he asked.

"I can't do it anymore," she said. "I'm sorry."

"Why?" he asked again, this time more sternly. She had known that her excuse wouldn't be good enough for him. He knew that she deep down loved that she got to help in her own way to protect Starling City.

"Oliver…" she trailed off and looked down again, tears filling her eyes. The crumbled piece of paper was still in her hands. As her fingers clenched around it, it made a sound which caused Oliver's eyes to move to it. He took a step forward and before she knew it, he was standing in front of her, taking her delicate hand in his. She wanted to pull away, but she couldn't. Not now, when she needed to tell him the truth. "I'm sorry," she said again and then proceeded to turn her palm downwards in his hand, giving him the paper in the process before pulling away from his grip.

Not being able to tear her gaze away from him as he opened the letter, she watched as his eyes slid over the words that were written across it. _Once, twice, thrice-_

"I don't understand," Oliver finally said, after reading the letter a fourth time. There was something different in his voice as he stared at her with wide eyes.

"I think you do understand, Oliver," Felicity mumbled, once again tears forming. "Don't make me say it."

"No," Oliver said sternly, letting go of the piece of paper as if it had burned him. "No, no, no…" He kept shaking his head as he moved toward her. His eyes mirrored her at the moment, shining with tears. "Please tell me it's a joke. Please tell me this is just some sick joke."

She inhaled sharply again, tears spilling over this time as she covered her mouth, trying to calm her own breathing as she watched the _real _Oliver break through the facade for the first time in a long, long time.. There was desperation in his eyes that she had never seen before.

"Oliver, I'm-"

"Don't say it," he interrupted, turning away from her. "Don't you _dare_ say it Felicity."

Time froze over.

"I'm dying, Oliver."

The next thing she knew strong arms had enveloped her in a hug and she couldn't stand anymore as the sobs rocked her body.

The piece of paper, with _Starling General Hospital_, written across it, was by their feet as Felicity clutched Oliver's shirt in her hands, burying her head in his chest as he held her tightly.

He didn't speak as she cried, only rubbed comforting circles on her lower back and kissed the top of her head over and over again. Swallowing, he managed to get a hold of himself long enough to get some comforting words out.

"We are going to make it through this," he told her. As the sobs got worse, he held her even tighter against him. "_You _are going to make it through, and I'll do everything in my power…" The rest of his words faded somewhere in the distance, and in that moment, Felicity knew that she wasn't alone in all of this, after all.

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_**A/N: Thank you for reading! And I apologize for any grammatical mistakes! English is not my first language!**_


	2. Telling Diggle

_**A/N: Hey guys! Because of the WONDERFUL reviews I got for the first drabble, I have decided to continue with the story! I'll probably post the drabbles once a week, that is, if I finish the drabbles on time! ;) Reviews are always appreciated!**_

_**DISCLAIMER: I own nothing but the idea for this fic!**_

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**"Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 2/?**

**Word count: 1,030**

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Telling Diggle wasn't much easier.

"_Stage 3 stomach cancer",_ the paper from the hospital had read. Oliver had needed to read it three times to make sure that his eyes weren't playing tricks on him and after comforting Felicity as she cried on his shoulder, he had decided to do _everything_ he could, so that she would survive. The pain he had felt in his chest as he looked into her teary eyes after she pulled away didn't surprise him much. After all, he had grown to care about her quite a lot since they had met.

Almost immediately, he had asked her which doctor she had been in contact with and how far along it meant to be stage three. She had been far to upset to even begin explaining it to him.

"We need to tell John," she had said, her breath still shaky and he had nodded and picked up his cell phone to tell John to meet them at the lair.

_-§-_

"What?" John said, staring at Oliver as he showed him the paper from the hospital. When Oliver didn't reply, Diggle turned to Felicity instead, who immediately fell forward into one of John's warm embraces, breaking into tears again.

"I still can't believe it," she cried. "It's been two weeks and I still haven't even told my parents... You two are the first to know."

Deep inside of him, an unexpected pride welled. It was weird, that even though his friend- because that was what they were now- was _dying_, he was weirdly _proud_ that he was the first one she had told the truth to. It wasn't as if it made him feel any better though, because quite frankly, he wished she had never had to tell anyone about it and that it wasn't true. Then his brain processed the words she had said and realized that she had waited _two whole weeks_ to tell him, and suddenly, he wasn't feeling so good about it anymore.

"Your parents," Diggle mumbled thoughtfully, interrupting Oliver's personal though process.. "When are you going to talk to them? We will be there with you, if you want us to."

"No offense," she said, wiping her tears away as her breathing calmed, "but I don't really think my parents will be expecting me to bring the billionaire I work for and his bodyguard with me when I tell them that I've been diagnosed with cancer."

"Felicity," Oliver said, but his voice was so uncharacteristically low that neither she nor Diggle heard him. He didn't want this for her; she didn't _deserve _this.

"No one does, Oliver," Felicity glumly said, and he realized that he must have voiced his thoughts out loud. "But what's done is done. There's nothing I can do now."

"Yes, there is," Oliver said. "You can keep fighting and we'll be there for you, every step of the way."

She turned around and faced him. "I told you, I want to quit," she said, frowning at him. "There's no point in fighting because the chance of survival is-"

"Small, but still there," Oliver interrupted before she had a chance to finish. Felicity shot him a look that he would normally find amusing, but there was nothing amusing about what she was suggesting. "You can't give up. You've never done it before, why start now?"

The challenge hung in the air for quite some time. Diggle didn't say a word and neither did Felicity. Oliver watched her intently as her hands once again began to shake with small tremors and even this time she tried to cover it up by clasping them together in front of her, as she had done at QC when she told him the truth.

"What do you want me to do? Just keep fighting?" Felicity asked, her tone a mixture of both sadness and annoyance. He could tell that she was getting worked up about it, yet he couldn't quite understand why. The Felicity he knew and cared about would _never _give up so easily. Perhaps he just wasn't grasping the seriousness of the disease? On the other hand, the fact that the illness was _terminal_, gave him a clue to just how bad it was.

"Do you want me to keep working here too? And at Queen Consolidated as your assistant?" Felicity continued, and he forced himself out if his thoughts.

"_Yes_," Oliver and Diggle replied at the same time. They looked at each other, coming to a silent agreement. Neither of them wanted Felicity to push them away. Who knew how far her illness had gone- stage three still didn't tell Oliver much- and they wanted to be there for her, as her friends. They wanted to be able to keep a close eye on her and they wanted to protect her.

Felicity took a deep breath and proceeded to rub her index fingers against her temples. "If I agree to stay, I don't want the two of you gushing over me just because I'm..." she trailed off, clearly not wanting to say the word 'dying' more than necessary. "I want you to treat me like you've always treated me; like I'm not sick."

Oliver started to protest, but Diggle shot him a warning look, effectively shutting him up. "Okay," Diggle agreed. "But you need to tell us when you have appointments and what the doctor says," he told her.

"Why?" Felicity asked, raising an eyebrow. "It won't make a difference anyway."

"We're your friends, Felicity," Oliver sighed. He didn't want to show her that he was annoyed with her for trying to belittle their friendship and for being so Goddamn stubborn. "As I said before: we're going to be with you, every step of the way and we need to know what the doctors tell you."

"Don't shut us out, Felicity," Diggle pleaded, putting his hand on her shoulder.

Felicity closed her eyes for a brief moment. "Okay," she finally said, caving. "I'll tell you everything."

And as she proceeded to do so, Oliver couldn't help but acknowledge how the tightness in his chest only grew with every word she spoke and the heavy weight kept building inside of him.

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_**A/N: As mentioned before, reviews are golden! :)**_

_**I would also like to thank all of you who reviewed and put this story on alert/favorite!**_

_**Remember, this fic is cross-posted on AO3, here and on Tumblr! It gets posted on Tumblr first (just FYI ;) )!**_


	3. Paleness and Tea Flavors

_**A/N: Hey guys! I'm sorry for completely missing out on posting this on Wednesday! I hope I can make it up to those who've waited patiently for the drabble with this slightly longer one!**_

_**Hope you enjoy! :)**_

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"**Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 3/?: Paleness and Tea Flavors**

**Word count: 2,194**

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It wasn't until a couple of days later that he noticed how pale she had become.

As difficult as it had been to inform Diggle of Felicity's illness, it had proven to be even more challenging to convince Felicity to stay working with them. Despite the fact that she had agreed to it in the Foundry that night, she had changed her mind at least ten times over the last three days. Repeatedly, she had changed it back too after Oliver and Diggle time after time reassured her that she wasn't, and never would be, a burden to the.

The thought that Felicity had actually wanted to give up and not fight the disease that was slowly killing her was an idea that Oliver wasn't fond of. His friend, the wonderful, strong and bubbly Felicity Smoak, would _never_ give up. At least she wouldn't have done that before...

Felicity had told them what the doctors had told her and she had agreed to let them know when she had her next appointment, because that was when they would be discussing possible treatments. She had rambled on and told them about the usual treatments the doctors had already informed her of, but on their next meeting, they would decide which treatment was best for her specifically.

There were two things that Felicity wasn't aware of at the moment.

First of all, it was the fact that Oliver was having a difficult time keeping his promise that he would treat her how he always had. He couldn't help but internally wince every time Felicity offered to work overtime, either in the lair or at the office. It wasn't easy to keep going about it as if nothing was wrong; to pretend as if his friend wasn't dying.

The horrible news had shaken him, just as they would shake anyone else. After Felicity had left to go home- she _insisted_ he didn't drive her- Diggle and he had stayed behind, trying to figure out what to do next. He had asked Diggle if he could do patrols for the night, which had turned out to be awfully silent anyway with minimal criminal activities. Instead, Oliver had spent the night watching the ceiling in his room from his bed, wondering if Felicity would still be by his and Diggle's side in a couple of months.

The second thing that Felicity _probably_ wasn't aware of, was that Oliver was watching her intently through the glass wall between their offices. She was currently filing a stack of papers and checking off a list, catching her pen between her lips every once in a while as she chewed on its tip. Her lips were painted in her usual fuchsia lipstick, and she was wearing a black pencil skirt along with a white loose blouse which was tucked into her skirt. On her feet, her usual panda flats tapped against the floor.

Oliver watched her as she ran a hand through her long, blonde hair and wondered what she was actually working on. Putting the pen on the table, she lifted the glasses up on her nose with her finger, turning to face the computer monitor instead. In turn, Oliver couldn't help but let his mind wander, if only for a moment, to some _highly_ inappropriate thoughts.

He shook his head at himself. Felicity was his _friend_.

Turning his attention to his own files which he had gone over ten times by now, in hopes that Felicity would decide to call it a night so he could walk her down to her car, he sighed. There was no point in trying to do _anything_ anymore. The nights had been longer than usual since Felicity's revelation and last night, after getting home, he had called his family's doctor, hoping that he had some contacts that might be able to help.

Despite the pain inside, he chuckled to himself. Turns out there were three things Felicity didn't know. The third was that he had used his father's connections all over the world to gather some of the best doctors and form a team that would try to help her.

Yet again, Oliver looked up. Felicity was leaning back in her chair, looking up at the ceiling, much like he had done the night before. He couldn't keep watching her if he wanted to keep sane, so he stood up and walked out to the hallway, trying to ignore the curious look she sent his way was as he made his exit.

When he returned, he was holding two cups, one with coffee and one with tea, but before entering the room, he stopped dead in his tracks. Felicity was standing with her back toward him, looking out window. Slowly, he walked up to her and stood by her side.

"Hey," he said, using his "Felicty-voice" which he only used with her.

"Hi," she whispered, still not looking at him. He held out the cup with the tea that she preferred drinking. "Thanks," she said, louder this time after clearing her throat. As she took the cup from him, their fingers brushed for a second too long. When he looked at her, he noticed just a hint of blush that had appeared on her cheeks. That's when he noticed it; how pale she had been all day.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, trying to keep an even tone as he spoke to her. His eyes kept going over her face, scanning her arms and usually creamy legs as he realized that she was looking a lot paler than usual. "Have you eaten something today?"

She scrunched her nose up, looking disgusted. "Yeah, but my appetite isn't what it used to be," she told him, bringing the cup to her lips and taking a sip. "God, I love this tea!" she exclaimed, making a sound that made the worried frown on Oliver's face transform into a small smile instead. "You know," she continued, still looking out the window, "I've always been more of a tea-person than a coffee-person. It was weird because my parents drank a lot of coffee and even when I was at MIT and had projects to finish, I never drank it. My roommates used to say that I was crazy for not liking it, but I guess it just wasn't..." she trailed off, looking at him curiously suddenly. "What?" she inquired, raising an eyebrow. "You're used to me rambling about irrelevant things, so what's that face?" she asked, pointing her finger at him, making a circular motion with it.

Oliver cleared his throat and grinned at her, looking away, out the window. "Nothing," he lied, when in truth, he was shocked at the thoughts that were making their way through his brain. "I never knew anyone could be _this_ passionate for some tea." His comment made her grin at him, and briefly, he forgot about her illness.

"You haven't tried _this _tea," she emphasized, holding the cup up for him to take. He looked at her warily before taking it from her, once again brushing his fingers against hers. It felt good. Better than he would ever admit out loud. Keeping his eyes on her, he took a small sip.

"You're right," he agreed. "It is good."

There was only three types of teas available at the office currently: gray tea, forest fruit tea and the one that he had chosen for Felicity, a mixture of peppermint and jasmine tea.

"You just took one right out of the basket, didn't you?" Felicity smiled knowingly, almost as if she had known that he was thinking how lucky he was to have chosen a tea that she liked by accident.

"Yeah," he admitted with a grin. "But since you like it, I guess I was lucky. I don't know a thing about teas."

"You know plenty!" Felicity protested, her amusement clear in her tone. "You know plenty of herbs and remedies which you must have used on the Island. I mean, if you didn't then you would probably have died from poisoning... Sorry," she bit out, after seeing the look in his face.

"It's okay, Felicity," he said, offering her a smile and her cup back, which she gladly took before taking another sip.

Then he realized what their exchange had meant. He had subconsciously put his lips where Felicity's had been only moments earlier, and now were again. Forcing himself not to think about it as an indirect kiss, he wanted to bang his head against a wall to prevent his brain for having those thoughts ever again.

"Do you know what will probably be my biggest regret?" Felicity asked, waking him from his inner battle.

"Don't talk like that," he told her, but she wasn't even looking at him anymore. Her eyes were once again focused on the city outside. It was dark and honestly, they should probably be in the lair now, preparing for a long night on the streets, but Oliver wasn't complaining. The lights in the various buildings illuminated and Oliver had never realized what a breathtaking view of the city he had from his and Felicity's offices.

"I mean, if I don't make it," she clarified. "Which doesn't mean I'll stop fighting, because you and Diggle would probably lock me in somewhere and force me into chemo anyway." He didn't deny it and she continued. "There are so many different kinds of teas out there, which I haven't tried yet. I know, it's weird, but that's the thing I'll regret most, if I don't make it." The sobriety in her tone shook Oliver. Honestly, it almost scared him a bit, which was surprising considering that he spent most of his night being a supposedly fearless vigilante.

"You'll regret not having drunk tea?" Oliver asked, his eyes still focused on her face, which really was paler than usual.

"I'll regret not seeing the world," Felicity explained. "Going with you to Russia is probably the only time that I've been out of the States," Oliver winced at the mention of Russia, "but yes, the tea is probably the reason for that too. I mean, can you imagine all the different cultures you can get a taste of by drinking tea? Almost every country that I've ever wanted to visit has their own tradition and special flavor. I just wish I'd get the chance to try them all out."

She raised her head to look at him when his hand connected with her shoulder. He squeezed it lightly and she offered him a smile. "You'll try them all, Felicity," he told her, almost as a promise.

Once more, she smiled, taking a sip from her cup of tea. "The city is beautiful tonight," she commented casually and he nodded.

"It is."

"We should probably get to the lair. Diggle might be waiting."

"He might, and yes, we probably should," he replied, yet he couldn't tear his eyes off of her. "How about I drive us there and we make a small stop on the way?" he suggested, an idea forming in his head.

Felicity turned to look at him, her eyes widening with curiosity. "A stop? Where?"

Instead of answering immediately, he took the cup from her fingers, brushing his fingers against hers again, and put them down on her desk before grabbing her coat. He helped her put it on and she kept looking at him, now almost suspiciously.

"It's a surprise," he chuckled.

"I don't particularly like surprises," Felicity informed him. "Not since the nut-incident in College- Oh_ my God... _I didn't mean-"

"I get it, Felicity," he laughed as her cheeks turned red. "I remember your nut-allergy."

"Good, because for a moment there, I thought you might have misinterpreted me and thought I meant-" He stopped her rambling by covering her mouth with his hand. Her eyes widened as she looked up at him, her lips still moving against his lips, mumbling something that sounded like an apology.

Ignoring the chills that he got from feeling her lips pressed against his hand, he smiled, "Let's just go before Diggle calls us."

"Okay," she agreed and together they walked out of the building.

As they settled into his car, she turned to look at him expectantly. "So where are we going?"

"A new tea house opened downtown last week," he grinned. "Their slogan is that they have 'every flavor from every corner of the world.'"

At first Felicity's eyes widened in excitement, before a frown appeared on her face instead. "But it's late," she pointed out. "It's probably closed."

"We can just check when they are open then," Oliver suggested, cursing himself for not thinking as logically as Felicity. Maybe because all he wanted to do was make her happy?

"Yes," Felicity nodded, smiling at him again, and all of the sudden, she didn't look so pale anymore. "Then we can go there another day."

"We will," Oliver promised, his smile mirroring hers.

-Olicity-

As they drove to the Foundry later, Oliver made a mental note to order more flavors of tea for the coffee-room at Queen Consolidated.

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_**A/N: Hope you liked it! Feel free to share your thoughts and thank you for reading! :)**_


	4. Appointments

**_A/N: Hey everyone! Thank you so much for reading, reviewing, putting the story and me on favorite/alert! It means a lot to me that people actually enjoy reading what I write._**

**_Hope you like it!_**

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"**Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 4/?: Appointments**

**Word count: 1,926**

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When Felicity arrived at _Starling General_, she was surprised to see none other than Oliver Queen sitting in the waiting room outside of her doctor's room.

The day had begun as it usually had the last couple of weeks; with stomach pains. She had gotten used to it by now, and the doctors had given her some pain killers to numb the pain, but she wasn't exactly a pill-happy person. Instead, she got out of her bed and walked around the room for a while, knowing that it would help because she had dealt with it way too many times to count by now.

It was in the morning that she usually got mad at herself for not going to the doctor sooner. On the other hand, when she had lost her appetite a while back, she figured it probably had to do with the stress that came with being on Team Arrow by night and keeping up with a good facade at day by being Oliver's Executive Assistant. How could she have known that loss of appetite was one of the symptoms of stomach cancer? When the abdominal pain began, she first blamed it on PMS, but when she was late- which she never usually was- she suspected something might be off. She visited the doctor the next day and they took some blood samples and then told her to go home, and that they would inform her as soon as they got the results.

Two or three days later, her doctor called her and asked her to come to the hospital so that they could speak. When Felicity asked him if something was wrong, he asked her to just get to the hospital as soon as she can.

She got there half an hour later.

Her doctor called her in and informed her of her condition and the only thing she did, was ask him to send her a paper with her test results so that she could use it when resigning. He didn't question her choice, because it wasn't his place, even though he thought the best thing for her would be to continue life like normal, and just come in for treatments and checkups.

He proceeded to tell her about the treatments, but she asked him if they could talk about it another day because she needed some time to think. The doctor told her that considering how far along the cancer was, it wasn't good to wait more than necessary, mostly because of how busy the hospital was these days. She had excused herself anyway and told him that she just needed to process things and inform her family before she entered any treatments.

Dr. Applebeam had called her in today and told her that she _needed_ to set up her treatment schedule with him immediately if she didn't want the cancer to get to stage 4. He hadn't given her another choice, so here she was, walking into the hospital and heading toward his office since he had told her not to wait at the reception.

"Oliver?" Felicity nearly gasped when she saw her friend sitting in the waiting room outside of Dr. Applebeam's office. "What are you doing here?"

He stood up from his chair, a relieved look on his face. "Good, you're here," he said instead of answering her. He took another step toward her and for a second Felicity thought he might hug her, but then he didn't.

"How did you know I would be here today?" she asked, causing him to look anywhere but at her.

"I might have called the hospital last night and demanded to speak to the doctor that was responsible for your treatment," he admitted, a cheap smile on his face.

Felicity didn't know whether she should be touched by his concern, or mad because of his invasion of her privacy. Then again, privacy wasn't something that was relevant anymore.

"You shouldn't have," Felicity managed to get out and he took her hand.

"If I hadn't, you might have had to wait another week, and only gotten worse," he told her softly. Her heart was beating fast in her chest when she realized that Oliver must have pulled some strings to get her the appointment and she couldn't help but be thankful.

Before she had the chance to thank him though, the door to Dr. Applebeam's office opened and the doctor, a man in his mid-thirties, stepped out. "Ms. Smoak?" he called, looking up at Felicity before turning to Oliver, "And Mr. Queen, I suppose?" He extended his hand toward Oliver, who shook it and nodded politely, his other hand still holding onto hers. "Will Mr. Queen be joining us today, Ms. Smoak?" Dr. Applebeam asked, looking at their hands.

Felicity looked up at Oliver, expecting him to let go of her hand, but he didn't. Instead, he squeezed it lightly, not looking away from the doctor. "Yes, he will," Felicity said, realizing that Oliver had no intention of leaving.

He held her hand as the doctor told her about the schedule he had set up for the treatment. Chemotherapy and radiation were top priority at the moment, because they needed to try to shrink the cancer before it spread to the rest of her body. Stage 3 was treated the same way as stage 2, with radiation therapy first and 5-flourouracil chemotherapy second. Considering that her cancer had just reached stage 3- at least that's what the doctors could see- they wanted her to begin with neoadjuvant chemotherapy as well, just to raise the chances of her getting better. After a couple of weeks of treatment, they would call her in for a surgery, to try and remove some of the tumor which had begun its penetration to the third layer and the more distant lymph nodes.

When Felicity glanced at Oliver, he looked like he was going to be sick, which was unexpected of him. She knew that he was worried for his friend, but also that he didn't understand everything the doctor was telling them.

"The positive thing, Ms. Smoak-"

"Please, call me Felicity," she interrupted.

The doctor smiled, "The positive thing, _Felicity_, is that you came in _before_ the cancer reached stage 3, which means that it still isn't _completely_ in stage 3," he explained. "That means that the chance of recovery is better than it would have been if you had been in the later part of the stage." Oliver turned to look at her, his eyes widening for a moment, almost hopeful. "However, that doesn't mean that it will be smooth sailing either. Getting through this will be hard, Felicity, but luckily, you have friends like Mr. Queen here, who are willing to help you fight."

Felicity blushed and Dr. Applebeam excused himself for a moment to go get some papers for her to fill in and to get a nurse to take some more blood samples. As soon as he had left the room, Oliver turned to look at her. "See? There is still a chance, Felicity," he told her.

"Yes, there is, Oliver," she smiled sadly, which only caused him to frown.

"What's wrong? You heard what he said," Oliver continued, but Felicity squeezed his hand to stop him from speaking. He effectively shut his mouth and stared at her. "Is there something you're not telling me?" he asked her quietly.

"The test results were from over two weeks ago, Oliver," she told him. "Who knows how it looks _now_."

"It's the _same_," Oliver stubbornly said, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose. "There might be a little change, but not much, which means that you'll still get the treatment that Dr. Applebeam mentioned."

Felicity bit her lip, but nodded. "Why did you come here today, Oliver?" she asked him, her voice so low that he had barely heard her.

"I wanted to be here for you," he said, his tone not wavering. "Diggle couldn't make it, unfortunately, but he'll be here next time."

"You told Diggle too?" Felicity asked and Oliver nodded.

"Well, since you didn't tell us yourself, which you _promised_ you would do, I had to tell him," he shrugged. She wasn't sure if he was accusing her for not telling them, or just making a point. Before she had a chance to ask him, the doctor walked back into the room, this time with a young nurse by his side.

"This is nurse Adams," he introduced, "and she'll be taking a couple of blood samples, Felicity." Felicity smiled at the girl, but she was staring at something else- _someone_ else. Oliver though, didn't seem to notice.

"Hi," Felicity said, shocked by her own tone. The nurse jumped and looked at Felicity, finally tearing her eyes off of Oliver. "I'm Felicity, and this is my friend, Oliver," she introduced, almost bitterly, but no one seemed to notice.

"Mr. Queen," the nurse nodded. "I know, I recognized you from the news," she said, a smile appearing on her lips. Felicity felt as if she wanted to throw up, but she wasn't quite sure why. Of course, it might have to do with the slight jealousy she _might_ be feeling at the moment, as nurse Adams looked at Oliver as if he was a piece of meat.

"Did you have any questions about the treatment, Felicity?" Dr. Applebeam asked, interrupting her thoughts of getting up from the checkup-chair and punching the girl on the nose.

"Actually," Felicity said, tearing her eyes away from the nurse, "I do." She glanced at Oliver and noticed that he hadn't taken his eyes off of her, even when the nurse had addressed him. "It's about the chemo," she explained. "Will my hair...?" she trailed off, leaving the question unfinished. She already knew the answer, because she wasn't _stupid_. That, however, didn't change the fact that she wanted the doctor to 'make it official'.

"Yes, Felicity," the doctor said sadly. "Your hair will most likely fall off during your treatment, but that is a minor loss compared to your life, which you might get to keep if everything goes as we hope it will."

Once again, Oliver squeezed her hand.

"It's okay," Felicity said. "I just wanted to know."

-§-

When Oliver later followed Felicity to her car after the appointment was over, he offered to drive her home, but she protested, saying that they still had work to do at QC.

"At least let me drive," Oliver sighed. "Diggle dropped me off here and I need to get to the office some way."

"I'll drive, Oliver," Felicity told him. "You just try to fit in the front passenger seat, which should be a challenge considering how big you are." It took a moment for her to register her words, and when she turned to Oliver with wide eyes, the smile on his face eased her worry.

"Your way of choosing your words is impressive, Ms. Smoak," he grinned before getting into the car, surprisingly quick.

As she drove Felicity absentmindedly caught the tips of her hair, twirling them around her fingers. A tightness made its way into her chest and she sighed deeply. The next thing she knew, Oliver reached over and took her hand which had been twirling the hair.

"It'll grow out again," he told her confidently. "Right after you get better."

He squeezed her hand again, like he had done at the doctor's office, and suddenly, the tightness in her chest was fading away again as she smiled lightly at him.

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_**A/N: As always, your thoughts matter! Any ideas are also welcome! Thank you for reading! :)**_


	5. Research and Miracles

_**A/N: Thank you so much for your continuous support and kind words! :)**_

_**I hope you'll enjoy this one, even if there's technically no Felicity in it!**_

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**"Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 5/?: Research and Miracles**

**Word count: 1,504**

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Oliver regretted his decision the second he started reading about metastasis.

After a long day at the office and an even longer night patrolling the city and training in the lair, Oliver had forced himself to make an appearance at Verdant. Diggle had offered to drive Felicity home and they had parted ways a couple of minutes past midnight. Yes, it had once again proven to be a slow night and after finishing patrols, Oliver had returned to the lair and told Diggle and Felicity that they could leave.

It amazed him sometimes, how much he had changed since being shipwrecked. It was only normal, of course, but even he couldn't deny the fact that he had missed listening to music the entire time he was stuck on Lian Yu. Now though, the music in the club was just annoying the hell out of him and making him quite uncomfortable. Nevertheless, he waved at a couple of people, small talked with a few others, flirted _innocently_ with a girl or two and then headed out to his motorcycle to drive home.

It wasn't until he was speeding through the streets that he realized why the music had bothered him tonight. The sole reason for it, was his friend, Felicity. How could he walk around in a club and pretend to party when she was sick? Why would _anyone_ party when Felicity was sick?

Naturally, he knew that no one besides him and Diggle knew about Felicity's illness, and that even if he broadcast it on national television, most people wouldn't even know who she was. They certainly wouldn't care about her condition. Oliver cared- he cared _a lot_.

When he had called the hospital and _demanded_ to speak with Felicity's doctor, he had practically forced the man to make an appointment the next day. He had then waited for Felicity's call, which had never come, and immediately he had called Diggle and informed him. Unfortunately, Diggle hadn't been able to make it, but Oliver took it upon himself to be by Felicity's side, even if she was sometimes too stubborn to agree to having him there.

He had taken the liberty of holding her hand one too many times already, but he knew that it made her- and _him_- feel better. Sometimes he was afraid that she might pull her hand away from him, so each time when her hand stayed in his, he exhaled a breath of relief. Holding Felicity's hand felt _good_, and for the time being, Oliver didn't want to question why he had made it a habit. Each time they had seen each other after the appointment, he discreetly took her hand in his and squeezed as he sat by her side while she checked some data on her monitors. At the office he would send her a smile or two throughout the day, or put his hand on her shoulder if they passed each other in the hallway.

If Diggle had noticed the change, he didn't say anything about it.

Oliver arrived at the Queen mansion a couple of minutes later and instantly, he threw himself on his bed. After laying there for a good hour or two, he realized that he wouldn't be able to fall asleep any time soon. Instead, he got up and pulled on a pair of old sweats and a black T-shirt of his, got his laptop and walked to the living room, where he settled on the couch. He googled '_stomach cancer_' first, and then proceeded reading through pretty much _every _site that popped up.

Every story he read, was written by family members who had had a loved one die. They told their stories and how they had gotten better, until one day it all just turned around and went to hell. He managed to find a survivor story or two, but those were not in the same stage as Felicity was, so he couldn't really make a connection between their different cases. Instead of reading the stories, he went on and read general facts about the disease, which he regretted profusely.

"Ollie?" a voice said from behind him, making him jump. He turned around and saw Thea standing in the doorway. "What are you doing down here?" she asked. He clicked down the pages quickly, trying to cover up the fact that he had been reading about alternative treatments for cancer, and turned back to his sister, offering her a smile.

"Couldn't sleep, so I decided to try and catch up on some pop culture," he offered, but Thea's eyes told him she didn't really believe him.

"Is that why you were looking up cancer treatments?" she inquired, not wasting any time to pretend that she hadn't seen what he was doing. "Is there something you want to tell me Oliver?" After asking her question, she walked up to him and sat by his side, taking the computer from him. She opened it and looked at the pages he had been reading from. "Why are you reading this?" Thea asked, a slight tremble in her voice.

"It's not me, Thea," Oliver told her, almost not recognizing his own voice. "It's, uh, a friend of mine," he hesitated. He wasn't sure if Felicity would appreciate him talking to Thea about her illness. Honestly, he wasn't sure why he had risked getting caught with the research in the first place.

"Your friend?" Thea said, finally looking up at him. He only nodded, not being able to respond. "Is he or she going to be okay?"

He _hated_ showing weakness, especially around his sister. Last time she had seen him upset had been at Tommy's funeral, but even then he had kept mostly to himself. "I don't know," he replied, his voice raspy. He cleared his throat and Thea took his hand in hers. She squeezed it sympathetically and then let go of it before she started searching for something.

Oliver watched her with interest as she pulled up page after page, until she finally settled on one. She turned the computer toward him. "This man," she said, pointing at a picture, "got the diagnosis stage 4 stomach cancer." Oliver leaned in to look at the man. He looked perfectly fine, along with his family. "Even after the doctors told him he only had two months to live, he fought and looked for alternative treatments because he wanted to live. He's been cancer _free_ for almost four years now," she told him.

"My friend has early stage 3," Oliver said, reading through the article quickly before Thea took the computer from him again. Once again she searched the web until she found a page.

"This woman," she said, "was treated with every possible therapy for her _lung cancer_, and miraculously, she got _pregnant_ despite her treatment, giving birth to a beautiful _healthy _baby boy."

"How is that even possible?" Oliver managed to choke out. He could feel his throat close up with emotions.

"It's a miracle, Ollie," Thea smiled sadly. "You were a miracle too. Maybe it's time that you start believing in them," she said. "Maybe you'll be able to help your friend by being there for him-"

"_Her_," Oliver interrupted. "She... I think she wanted to give up first, but I managed to convince her with the help of another friend."

"How come you've never told me about this girl?" Thea inquired. "She sounds like she's pretty special to you."

Internally Oliver cursed his sister for being so good at deducing things. "She is," Oliver admitted. _More than I could ever tell her, _he wanted to say, but knew he couldn't. It would be unfair to admit to anyone that he had always thought of Felicity as just a little bit more than a friend. He had told her after Russia, that he couldn't be with someone he could really care about, and that had been true. However, that didn't change the fact that the connection he felt with her ran deeper than most would even understand. He knew that she had had some kind of a crush on him, but he had never allowed himself to act on it because it would probably have ruined them. She was too valuable for his work; she was too important to _him_. If he told her how he had grown to feel about her, she would probably accuse him of only saying so because she's dying, and of course, that would be the first thought of everyone else too. '_Oliver Queen's charity case'_ is probably what they would call her in the magazines, and Felicity deserved more than that.

So no, he wouldn't cause her more pain by telling her how he felt. At least not at the moment. If Thea was right, he was going to hope for a miracle that would save her, and _when_ she gets better, he will not waste another second and immediately tell her how he feels. Maybe then, she'll allow him to stand by her side, forever.

* * *

**_A/N: Oooh, Oliver coming to realize a few things is always good- I think! ^^ Honestly, I was having a bit of mixed feelings about this chapter, but I sort of wanted to have some Oliver/Thea sibling bonding too. I mean, I don't think Oliver would be able to keep YET ANOTHER secret from his sister... But that's just my thoughts on it._**

**_Next week, there'll be a shared lunch coming up! ;)_**

**_Thank you for reading! Reviews are always welcome!_**

**_P.S. And the survival stories of the man with Stage 4 stomach cancer and the pregnant woman with lung cancer are true! One of them I read up on online and the other I saw on the news and read an article about in the newspaper, so I haven't made those up! :)_**


	6. Lunch with Diggle

_**A/N: Happy Drabble Wednesday everyone! And Arrow is back tonight (but since I live in Narnia, I won't be able to watch it until tomorrow morning... *sigh*)! Anyway, here's the next part of Crumbled Papers! :) If you haven't yet checked out the poster I made, you can do so on my tumblr! :)**_

_**Thank you for all the support! I love you guys!**_

* * *

"**Crumbled papers"**

**Chapter 6/?: Lunch with Diggle**

**Word count: 1,565**

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Felicity sat at their usual table at Big Belly Burger, waiting on Diggle to return from the bathroom. The two of them and Oliver had decided to have lunch together to get some 'Team Time' in, as she liked to refer to it as, but unfortunately, Oliver was currently stuck in traffic and running late.

"How are you feeling, Felicity?" Diggle asked when he returned to the table. They had already ordered their food and were waiting for Carly to bring it over. "Oliver filled me in on the appointment and the treatment plan. Are you nervous?"

Felicity smiled slightly. "About fighting to survive? No," she said, shaking her head. "Now that I think about it, I probably should have been more nervous about your reactions when I almost decided _not_ to fight," she mused.

Instantly, Diggle's look fell. "Yeah, I'm sorry that I have to express myself so bluntly, but what the hell were you even thinking?" he asked. "Did you really think we would let you go without a fight?"

"I honestly don't know," she sighed. "Maybe it was just my way of coping with everything?" Trying to avoid his gaze, she looked down at the table and began scraping at it lightly with her index finger. "Oliver was very optimistic after the appointment," she said, "but Dr. Applebeam told us it would be a difficult journey."

"I'm sorry I couldn't be there," Diggle said, putting his hand over hers to stop her from making a permanent mark on the table.

"It's okay," she smiled, finally looking up at him. "You'll be there next time."

"Yeah, and I'm still a little mad at you for not telling us about the appointment the second you got the call," he told her and she couldn't help but grin sheepishly at him.

"Well, now that I know that Oliver is in direct contact with my doctor, I won't really have to tell you since he'll probably find out before I do," she said, causing Diggle to chuckle.

"You're right," he said thoughtfully. "And he'll tell me, and I'll be there for you too. That's what friends are for, aren't they?"

"Sometimes, I think I'm too lucky to have gotten involved in...the _business_," she said, almost mentioning the Arrow out loud before managing to stop herself. "I mean, otherwise I would probably have been going through all of this alone."

"Don't talk like that, Felicity," Diggle said. "You probably had lots of friends before me and Oliver. _Better_ friends even."

"Sure, I had friends," Felicity said, "but not friends that were close enough to tell about a terminal disease. You and Oliver are my closest friends, and not just because we share a common secret."

Diggle watched her carefully for a good minute. She wondered if she had said too much. Maybe Diggle and Oliver only saw her as someone they worked with? Had she gotten it all wrong? No, she couldn't have. Why else would they pretty much force her to accept the treatment the doctors were offering? Why else would Oliver have been there for her and why else would Diggle be sorry that he missed it? Of course they cared about her! She was being silly.

"We're lucky to have you on our team, Felicity," Diggle told her, interrupting her though process. "And I'm a lucky man to be able to call you my friend," he said, just before Carly brought over their food.

"I'll bring over Oliver's food when he gets here," Carly smiled at them before walking off.

"Thank you," Felicity called after her, looking down at her plate. The burger that would usually make her mouth water didn't look very appealing now.

"What's wrong?" Diggle asked. He had been about to take a bite from his own burger when he had seen her expression and stopped.

"My appetite hasn't been what it used to be," Felicity replied, trying to brush it all off with a shrug. She carefully took the burger into her hands, thinking that maybe she'll like it when she takes a bite from it.

"You have to eat, Felicity," Diggle stated, "but if you don't feel like eating the burger, there are other things too, you know." He motioned to the menu on the table, but Felicity quickly shook her head.

"No, the burger will do fine," she said, taking a small bite from it. "See?" she mumbled, chewing slowly. She felt sick to her stomach, no pun intended, but she tried not to show it. Although, by the look she was receiving from Diggle, she could tell that she wasn't very convincing.

"I'll ask Carly to bring you a milkshake," he said and she put the burger down with a sigh.

"I'm sorry, Dig," she said. "I don't want to be a burden."

"You're _never_ a burden," Diggle calmly said. "Sure, sometimes you make it very hard for us to not laugh as you ramble away, but I find that more endearing than burdensome," he joked.

Felicity's lips curled in a half-smile. "I'll be taking that as a compliment then," she smiled.

"And to return to our previous conversation about survival," Diggle said, wiping his mouth with a napkin, "I think you'll be fine as long as you don't give up. I saw a lot of things during my time in the army, and honestly, I wish I could tell you that all of them were good, but they weren't. All I know is that I learned that if you keep fighting, you'll eventually pull through," he explained. "Once my unit and I were ambushed by the Taliban, and all because I stopped to try and help a young girl. All of my men, my _friends, _were killed, but I didn't stop fighting until I had killed every last one of the people who ambushed us. It was difficult, and honestly, there were a few close calls when I thought I was done for," he told her. He seemed to be deep in thoughts as he told his story. Felicity tried to pull him back by putting her hand over his, much like he had done to her earlier. She gave him a sad, yet reassuring smile, and was glad to see that he mirrored it with his own lips turning up. "The point is that I kept fighting and _I _pulled through. You can do the same, because I _know_ that you're strong enough," he finished.

Felicity nodded at him. "I wasn't sure I was at first," she told him. "When I first got the news, I didn't know how to deal with it. I guess that's why it took so long for me to tell you guys. I mean," she shook her head at herself, "it took me _two weeks_ to tell you, and even then, I was barely able to bring myself to do it. Believe me when I tell you that I didn't feel very strong then."

She paused as Carly came up to them and asked them if they wanted anything else while they waited for Oliver. Diggle asked her to bring Felicity a strawberry milkshake. At first Felicity had wanted to protest, because she _really_ wasn't hungry at all, but then her stomach growled and she almost groaned at herself for changing her mind so often. Carly only smiled at her, walked away and then came back with the shake a few minutes later. During that time, Diggle had finished eating his own burger, and offered to take care of Felicity's as well, which she was glad to get rid of.

She took a long sip from the milkshake, savoring the taste of strawberries and bananas for a moment before picking up where she'd left off. "After I told you the truth, the reality of it all sort of hit me like a ton of bricks," she said. "I didn't see a reason to keep fighting and now I'm guessing that it was because I kind of had hit my absolute lowest point. What really scared me though, was when you guys pretty much told me that I was being stupid for not even trying," she admitted. "It was a wake-up call in a way, I suppose. Mostly because I hadn't felt that I had a reason to live."

Diggle surprised her by smiling. "And now?" he asked. "Have you found a reason?" His question hung in the air for a while. As she was contemplating it, she heard the door opening behind her and she turned around, only to see Oliver stepping inside. He scanned the place for them until his eyes finally met hers, and he smiled brightly at her. When he waved and mouthed that he would be there as soon as he told Carly he was there so that she could get him his meal and Felicity waved back at him before finally facing Diggle again.

"I have," she told him, just as Oliver joined them at the table. He sat down next to Felicity and lightly put his hand over hers and squeezed before pulling it back and apologizing for being late. As he told them about the traffic, Felicity listened intently, not being bothered the slightest by the knowing look that was being displayed on Diggle's face, as he watched her and Oliver agree on how much they loathed about red lights and traffic jams.

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_**A/N: I really hoped you liked this chapter! Reviews are golden, as usual, and next week, you'll get to read about Felicity's first treatment! If you only knew the feels I had while writing that one...**_

_**Oh well, if you have any questions, feel free to PM me or ask on tumblr (where I'm more active)! Thank you once again for reading! **_


	7. Treatments

_**A/N: Drabble Wednesday! Sorry for being late with the chapter! I got held up with something else, but it's still ten to midnight here where I live, so technically, it's still Wednesday! ;)**_

_**Hope you like the chapter! Had a lot of feels while writing it.**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

**"Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 7/?: Treatments**

**Word count: 2,412**

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Felicity was watching the monitors in the Foundry intently, not tearing her gaze from them for even a second. On the training mats, Diggle and Oliver were sparring, and she was contemplating on how to bring up the subject that was currently occupying her brain.

"Oliver," she finally spoke up; it was now or never. Besides, she was almost one hundred percent sure that he already knew, but just hadn't said anything about it.

Handing out one last strike, causing Diggle to fall to the mat, he turned to face Felicity, who wasn't even looking at him. She did however see his sweaty and shirtless reflection in one of the monitors.

"Yeah?" he asked, reaching for his bottle of water, taking a sip from it as he waited for her to continue.

"I'm going to need the morning off tomorrow," she told him and then waited for his reply.

"Okay, how come?" he asked and she heard him take another sip. Internally, she groaned. She knew what he was doing. Trying to sound all innocent and unknowing, when in truth, he had probably gotten a call before she had. He clearly wanted her to tell him anyway.

So she did. "I have my first treatment scheduled tomorrow morning," she said, trying to sound just as careless as he was pretending to be.

"What time?" John inquired, but Felicity still didn't turn to face them.

"Eight in the morning," she answered. "I talked to Dr. Applebeam yesterday and told him that I wanted the treatment early so that I could be back at work for lunch," she explained quickly. "I understand if the two of you are busy though. I mean, Oliver, I _know_ you are busy, since I went through your schedule this morning and saw that you had a meeting with some potential clients, so I understand if-"

"I'll cancel the meeting and reschedule," Oliver said, his tone serene. "Dig?"

"Do you want me to pick you up, or should we meet at the hospital?"

Felicity almost smiled. Even though they were insistent to be there for her, she couldn't help but think reasonably. She knew very well that they couldn't be there to hold her hand every time, because they too had lives to maintain, but sometimes, she just wanted to be selfish and handcuff them to herself so that they wouldn't leave her side at all.

The reason she was trying to sound so _okay_ with all of it, was that in reality, she was scared as hell. When Dr. Applebeam had called her and told her that he had made an appointment for her to receive her first treatment for the disease that was eating her from the inside, she had wanted nothing more than to ignore it all and bury herself in work instead, all because of her fear. It wasn't just the fear of receiving the treatment though; it was also the fear of the treatment not working. She had read rapports on it and watched enough documentaries about cancer to know that sometimes it just didn't work. The doctors would try and try again, but ultimately, it all had the same result: death.

This was why she was glad that Diggle and Oliver would be there with her. Whenever she was alone, she usually let her mind wander off to places that weren't so bright and happy. The only thing that kept her occupied, were her two friends and the work they did together, both during the day and during the night.

"Hey," Oliver's voice broke through her inner thoughts. She finally turned to look at him. He had walked up to stand by her side and put one of his incredibly warm hands on her shoulder. "You're not alone," he reminded her, squeezing her shoulder lightly.

She only offered him a small smile and a nod, before going back to work.

-§-

The next morning Felicity wasn't surprised when she got to the hospital, only to see Oliver and Diggle already waiting for her outside.

"Good morning," she told them, trying to keep her tone positive, but she knew that she wasn't fooling them. She had never been very good at hiding her nervousness and fear, and right now, she knew that she probably looked like a deer in headlights.

"Morning, Felicity," Diggle said, giving her a reassuring hug as a greeting. Oliver, however, kept his distance, but smiled encouragingly at her as they walked inside and went directly to Dr. Applebeam's office.

"Ah, Felicity," Dr. Applebeam said when he spotted them. He had been talking to a nurse, showing her some papers, and Felicity was glad that it wasn't that nurse Adams who had looked at Oliver as if he was a piece of meat.

"Dr. Applebeam," Felicity acknowledged. "You've met Oliver already," she said and the doctor nodded, "this is my friend Mr. Diggle," she introduced.

Diggle shook the doctors hand, "John," he said politely and the doctor nodded.

"It's good that you've brought someone to keep you company today," the doctor said. "I've made sure that you have a room all to yourself today since it's your first treatment. I believe we decided that we'd start off with radiation, which will take approximately half an hour and then we'll get you some 5-flourouracil chemo," he said, checking his notes as he did.

Felicity nodded and managed to choke out a small "yes," when she felt a warm hand wrap around hers. Straightaway, Oliver managed to bring her back. She glanced at him from the side, but he didn't move or do anything else that would indicate that anything was out of the ordinary.

"I'll need you to change into a hospital gown for a while, but I'll have a nurse bring it over to you as soon as you get settled in the room," he said, offering her an encouraging smile.

"Okay," she nodded, trying to smile back, but she knew it must have ended up more like a grimace.

"Felicity, this is _good_," Dr. Applebeam insisted. "Usually, we start off with a surgery to see how things are, but since we got such clear pictures from your first check up, we decided that it would be better to begin with the treatment immediately."

Felicity didn't say anything, only nodded as the doctor called over a nurse to show them to the room. He told them that he would be there shortly to inform them how the treatment would go down in more detail.

When they got to the room, she slowly pulled her hand away from Oliver's, but only because the nurse handed her the gown she would be wearing and instructed her to only keep her panties on for the radiation therapy. Felicity hadn't been able to hide the blush that crept up her cheeks, and avoided looking at both Diggle and Oliver with all her might as she walked into the bathroom to change.

It took her a good couple of minutes, because she felt the need to collect herself before she walked back into the room. When she did, Oliver and Diggle were standing by the window, looking out. She could tell that they had talked about something, but she knew she would probably never find out. So, she cleared her throat and they turned to face her. Awkwardly, she tugged on the gown, even though it went to her knees as she offered them a small smile. She was nervous, and she knew that they could tell, but instead of saying anything, both of them crossed the room at the same time and embraced her tightly. Maybe it should have felt strange, this group hug, but Felicity only felt its effect as a wave of support and calmness washed over her.

They pulled back at the same time and this time, Felicity smiled brightly at them. "Thank you, guys. I needed that," she told them.

The hug really had helped her gather her courage for the next hour that followed. First, Dr. Applebeam informed her in detail of the radiation treatment and told her that Oliver and Diggle unfortunately couldn't be in the room with her. However, they could stay in the monitoring room where the doctors would be, and they would be able to speak if they wanted to through microphones and speakers.

The table felt cold through the thin fabric of the gown as Felicity laid down on it. Some nurses worked around her, checking things and marking them off on their notes. For a second she thought she had seen nurse Adams in there, but she couldn't be sure since her thoughts were spiraling out of control. It had taken twenty minutes for the doctor to explain how it would all go down, another twenty minutes to prepare for the treatment and make the necessary measurements and finally, what had seemed to take the longest, yet another twenty minutes for the treatment.

She heard the static of the speakers as they turned the microphone on in the observation room. It all reminded her about the devices they used to communicate when Oliver and Diggle were out on the field. "How are you doing in there, Felicity?" Dr. Applebeam asked her.

She didn't respond, because she honestly had no clue what to say. Sure, she was uncomfortable, because she couldn't see any of them because her table was turned sideways to them and she had gotten strict orders not to move around after they had locked the poisonous rays on the target, but she wasn't in pain. Actually, she was feeling quite numb.

The static was heard once again, but this time, another voice spoke. "_Felicity__._" Oliver's tone broke through and Felicity couldn't help but wonder for a moment if he was looking as worried as he sounded.

"I'm okay," she finally replied, a small smile tugging at her lips.

"We're here," Oliver spoke again, and this time she could hear the relief in his tone. "Both of us."

"I know," she said calmly, and once again the static was gone. She had to stay there for yet another ten minutes, before the doctor shut the machines down and she could finally sit up.

Next, they took her back to the room Dr. Applebeam had reserved for her, and she laid down on the bed, closing her eyes for a long moment. She had done it. She had taken the first step on the incredibly long journey that she had ahead of her.

Dr. Applebeam walked in with some nurses in a tow, and told her that he wouldn't be able to stay for the next part of her scheduled treatment because he had another case to attend to. Both Felicity and Diggle had had to glare at Oliver pointedly so that he wouldn't say something to object, because the look that had covered his face for a split second had told them that he had been about to use his "Arrow-voice", as Felicity had dubbed it, on the poor doctor.

Soon enough, the nurses had hooked her up to the bags that would be feeding her body the poison that would hopefully destroy the killer that was inside of her. Then, it was just her, Diggle and Oliver left.

"How are you feeling?" Diggle asked after an hour. Felicity had been watching the IV intently, as if trying to see if she could spot the drugs killing both the good and the bad cells in her body.

"I'm fine," she said thoughtfully. "Although, I am a little tired. Who knew that chemo could take so long?" she giggled.

Diggle smiled back at her as he put his hand over hers, but Oliver, who sat at the end of the bed, only looked sick. "The doctor said it would take another hour or two, and that you can go home then," Diggle reminded her.

"But we have to get back to the office first," Felicity said, shifting slightly on the bed. "Oliver, you have a meeting in three hours, and if you're not there, then Isabel will-"

"It's okay, Felicity," Oliver spoke up. "Don't worry about it." Felicity met his gaze, instantly knowing that he wouldn't be there at all. Instead of saying anything else, she closed her eyes for another moment.

Half an hour had passed when she finally opened them again. She could have sworn she had only blinked, but it seemed that she had dozed off a bit. Oliver had moved his chair and was sitting on the other side of her bed, watching her intently. He had his elbows on his knees and his head rested in his hands, but when he met her eyes, he seemed to calm down a bit.

"Hi," he said, a small smile on his face.

"Hey," she smiled back. "I can't believe I fell asleep."

"The nurses told us that it was perfectly normal," Diggle said from her other side. "Especially since it's your first treatment. Fatigue and nausea are normal."

"Well, I'm not feeling sick yet, if there was an underlying question in your statement," Felicity said thoughtfully. "God, I hate hospitals," she groaned. "They smell weird and they remind me of that time in college when I ate that brownie by accident and suffered from an allergic reaction. I can't wait to get out of here."

"Just an hour or so left," Diggle told her, sounding amused. Of course her rambling amused him. Quite frankly, she thought she had even seen Oliver's lips quirk slightly at it, but she didn't mind. She was only grateful that they were there with her.

"I'm glad you're here," she told them, feeling the need to express her thoughts. "I really, really am."

Diggle was still holding her left hand, but then she felt Oliver take her right one in his. He squeezed it lightly, causing her to turn to look at him.

"We're here," he told her again, just like he had during her radiation treatment. For some reason, it felt as if he was telling her something else too, but she decided she didn't want to think deeper on the matter. Maybe she was over-analyzing things, as she had a tendency to do sometimes?

Instead, she did what she had done as she had laid on that cold table in the radiation room. She smiled, but this time, since she had his hand in hers, she squeezed it back too, before speaking, "I know."

* * *

**_A/N: Reviews are golden! :)_**

**_Thank you for reading!_**


	8. Rides

_**A/N: Drabble Wednesday time! :D Which means another chapter of Crumbled Papers for you guys!**_

_**Once again, thank you for all the support you're giving me and this story! It really means more to me than you'll ever know!**_

_**Enjoy!**_

* * *

"**Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 8/?: Rides**

**Word count: 2,343**

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The only sound that could be heard in the Foundry, was Felicity's typing and Oliver's occasional grunting as he trained. Diggle had gone home for the night, and Oliver had just recently returned from patrolling. He had told Felicity over the comm that she could go home, but she had told him that she had some last searches to go through.

The truth, however, was that she had spent most of the day looking through old pictures on her cousin Mark's Facebook page. He was quite the adventurer, Mark, she mused quietly, as she looked at the pictures of him driving a dirt bike on some foreign location she had only seen on the _Discovery Channel_. Next came some pictures of him climbing the Mount Everest with his girlfriend, him in a helicopter for his twenty-first birthday and one of him jumping off a small bridge in some European Country.

She glanced over at Oliver, thinking of the things he must have been through while shipwrecked. Besides the constant terror, Felicity figured, it must have been quite an adventure. There were still a lot of things that Oliver had told her and Diggle were to painful to talk about, but at the same time, he had told them quite a few stories since they got to know each other.

Felicity knew Oliver had been through a lot, and the issues she was having at the time, only seemed miniscule in comparison. Taking her eyes off her computer, she glanced over at Oliver, who was preparing to get on the salmon ladder. Once again, she turned back to her computer and looked at Mark's pictures again.

"I want to jump off a building."

_Clank!_

Felicity turned at the sound of metal dropping and Oliver groaning, raising her hand to her mouth at the sight that met her. Oliver was laying on his back, the stick he used on the salmon ladder had fallen out of his hand and was rolling on the floor.

"Oh my god!" Felicity exclaimed, standing up. Although, she didn't move closer to him. "Are you okay?"

Quickly, Oliver rose to his feet and inhaled sharply, rubbing his shoulder lightly. Without speaking, he only gave her a look, and in that moment, she thought back to what she had actually said.

"Not to kill myself!" she said quickly, realizing what it must have sounded like to him. Oh, she really needed to think before she spoke. "I mean, I want to live," she blurted, "but I really want to jump off a building too you know... Like, bungee jump!" she explained. Her hands were twitching and Oliver shot her a confused look. "Skydiving could also be an option, but I kind of did that when Diggle and I came to get you on Lian Yu... I don't know if I want to count that though, since Diggle pretty much had to force me to-"

"Felicity," Oliver interrupted. She shut her lips tightly and looked at him expectantly, but he didn't say anything else.

"Climbing a mountain could also be a good option," she began again, but Oliver took a step toward her, his face stern.

"I'm not letting you jump off a building," he told her, his tone mirroring his look perfectly. As he took yet another step toward her, she began feeling a bit cornered, but for some reason, the way he had spoken, only made her annoyed.

"Why not?" she exclaimed. "You jump off of buildings all the time! You get shot, and you hurt yourself, giving me mini-heart-attacks as I listen over the feed!"

At the mention of mini-heart-attacks, Oliver's lips quirked up in a small smile, but it only lasted for a second before his face turned even more serious than earlier. "And you're not getting shot any time soon either," he informed.

She groaned and sat back on her chair, spinning around once or twice before Oliver stopped her by putting his hands on her shoulders.

"What brought all this on?" he asked, this time softer. He looked genuinely curious to her sudden outburst and unexpected ramble, and she contemplated just shrugging it off as not important. Yet, she knew that he wouldn't just let it go.

"It's just that, I'm _dying_, Oliver," she sighed, watching as his muscles tensed. His hands squeezed her shoulders lightly, and she knew he didn't like _that_ word. Ignoring his reaction, she continued, "It sucks, and I know that I'm trying to fight and whatever, but it really, really, really-"

"Sucks," he finished for her, his grip on her shoulders loosening slightly.

"Yeah," she bit out. "The thing is that when I think about what everyone else my age has done, my life is kind of boring, you know? I mean, the only two real risks I've ever taken in my life are jumping out of that plane with Diggle, which as mentioned, I don't really count, and joining Team Arrow," she explained.

"You've taken _plenty_ of risks, Felicity," Oliver reasoned. "Not that I like it when you do," he added quickly.

"But most of them have been with Arrow-business," Felicity complained, earning another look from Oliver at her tone. "I just want to _live_. Do something crazy. I know it's cliche, but I just want to be able to say that I've done _something_ exciting for _once_. Like, something that I could tell my kids one-" she stopped short, her mouth still open. She felt as if the breath had been knocked out of her. Letting out a shaky breath, she spoke again, "Never mind, I guess it really doesn't matter."

How could she be so stupid sometimes? Surviving stage 3 was already difficult as it was, and here she was, making Oliver worry about her sanity by proclaiming that she wanted to jump off buildings, and for _what_? So she could tell her _children_ about it. Her chest tightened as she realized that she would probably never have a kid of her own...

"Felicity," Oliver said, breaking through her thoughts. Without realizing it, she had turned off the computers and started getting dressed to head home. "I'll just take a quick shower and change. Wait here," he pretty much ordered.

"What?" she asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

Once again, his hands found her shoulders. "Trust me," he smiled before walking off. She sat back down on her chair without hesitation. When it came to trusting Oliver, she never thought twice about it. Not only was he her friend and hero, but he was also her partner. For some reason, that title meant a lot more to Felicity than the others. Partners needed to trust each other, no matter what, and she did, she really did trust him with her life.

Oliver stepped out five minutes later, washed clean and dressed. He grabbed his keys and motioned for him to follow him, which she gladly did. She didn't speak as he grabbed two motorcycle helmets and led her through the backdoor at Verdant, to where his bike was parked. It wasn't until he made a move to put one of the helmets on her head that she spoke.

"What are you doing?" she asked, but she couldn't help the smile that spread across her lips. She knew perfectly well what he was doing.

"You're saying you want to do something exciting," he pointed out. "You want to do something crazy, and I want to keep you safe, so we're going to compromise," he announced.

"By teaching me to ride a bike, or just go on a ride with you?" she asked, closing her eyes for a moment at her choice of words. "I meant going on a ride on your _bike_ with you," she clarified.

"I understood," Oliver chuckled. "But yes, you're going on a ride with me. On my bike," he mocked, putting the helmet on her head before pulling her hair out over her shoulders. He turned away from her and climbed on the bike, motioning for her to get on behind him with his head while putting on his leather gloves. They went good with the jacket he was sporting.

Felicity climbed on the back and he showed her where to put her feet. "How is riding a motorcycle going to be something worth telling people? Besides the fact that you're Oliver Queen, my boss? I mean, I've been on a bike once or twice with an ex of mine, but it wasn't exactly memorable."

Oliver's bike roared to life as he turned his head to look at her. "You've never been on a ride with anyone like _me_," he winked, finally putting his own helmet on. "Hold on tight," he said, and she instantly wrapped her arms around him. The next thing she knew, they were flying through the streets of Starling City.

To say that it was exciting, would be an understatement. Felicity's eyes were wide as Oliver swerved and steered them through the night traffic, holding onto him tightly, but she couldn't stop laughing for some reason. Oliver's driving was _crazy_, to say the least, but she also knew he was holding back so that he could keep her safe. His compromise made sense to her now, but she really appreciated it.

"Are you okay?" he called out and she nodded against his back.

"Yes! I'm better than okay!" she shouted back over the wind. A giggle rose in her throat as he sped up a little more, and she actually let out a squeal of joy. The shaking she felt as she leaned her helmet-clad head against Oliver's broad shoulders proved to her that Oliver was just as amused as she was and that he was laughing with her.

Then, his speed slowed slightly. Felicity was about to complain, but stopped herself when she felt his gloved hand fall over her own. Her heart was racing, and not only because of the adrenaline she could feel rushing through her body. The small gesture, which had become somewhat of a 'thing' between them, gave her comfort like nothing else. Sometimes, she wondered if Oliver was aware of that, and that that was the reason he kept taking her hand.

His hand stayed there, over hers, as he steered them through the streets, his speed slowing until he finally stopped completely, putting his feet back on the ground and turning the bike off. She didn't feel like letting go of him just yet, and she gave herself another ten seconds of just holding him. His other hand also came down to hold onto the one he hadn't been holding, and he didn't speak first. She was feeling good, and from what she could tell, so was he. He seemed relaxed as she held onto him, and when he broke the silence _twenty _seconds later, his voice was raspy.

"Felicity."

She only hummed in response, and he squeezed her hands once more.

"I have something else to show you, which will hopefully make this night worth telling people about," he told her, his voice back to normal again.

Realizing that they couldn't stay like that forever, she finally let go of him, but instantly felt the loss as he got off the bike. She got off as well and he took of his own helmet first before taking off hers. For a solid four seconds, time seemed to stand still as they looked at each other. Felicity blinked a few times, watching as emotion after emotion passed through Oliver's eyes. She wanted to put a name to every last one of them, but they were never there long enough for her to recognize them and before she knew it, he had broken the gaze, only to put the helmets on the bike.

"Won't someone take them?" she asked, finally finding her voice.

"I don't really care," he shrugged. "I have a couple of others at home anyway."

"You're disgustingly rich," she joked and he actually cracked another smile.

"Come on," he said, taking her hand and leading her into an ally.

"You aren't going to kill me, are you? I mean, I know you're not, but you never know when someone snaps, and- Oh never mind," she groaned. "I think I've reached my limit on being funny today."

Still, he chuckled at her failed attempt at a joke.

"Where are we going?" she asked as he led her to the emergency staircase connected to the building.

"To the roof," he replied, still holding her hand as he led them up the stairs.

"The roof?"

"I've been up here patrolling multiple times," he explained. "It gives a great view of the city," he said as they finally reached the top. Felicity's eyes widened as she took in the sight. Starling really was beautiful at night. The building they were standing on probably wasn't the tallest one, but it was in a place that gave one of the most beautiful views she had ever seen.

At Queen Consolidated, they always looked down on the city, but here... Her eyes followed the flickering lights of cars and the bigger buildings on the other side of town, which were visible from where they stood.

"Pretty, isn't it?" Oliver asked, standing beside her. She hadn't realized it until then, but she had been walking closer and closer to the edge to get a better look.

"Oliver," she breathed, turning to look at him. Her eyes were filling with tears and she fought the urge to throw herself at him and hug him. Instead, she gave him a smile. "Thank you."

He responded by simply taking her hand in his and putting light pressure to it before turning back to look at the view. She watched him for another moment, before following his gaze.

As they sat there on the edge all night, holding hands while arguing over where Queen Consolidated was, Felicity decided that she didn't want to tell anyone about this night. She wanted to keep it all to herself, which would only make it even more special.

* * *

_**A/N: What did you think? This was one of the happier kind, since I was kinda just feeling like it! :)**_

_**Reviews are golden!**_

_**Next Wednesday, Felicity's parents will be explained for those of you who have been wondering! ;)**_

_**Thank you for reading!**_


	9. Phone calls and Story telling

_A/N: Drabble Wednesday, yay! And a new episode of Arrow is on tonight too! Too bad I live in Narnia and won't be able to watch it until tomorrow morning, but then I have to go to school too, so I won't be able to see it until later in the evening... Oh well, college sucks!_

_Also, next Wednesday, I have a HUGE statistics exam coming up and I really, really need to study, so I'm not sure I'll be able to post next week... But we'll see!_

_I hope you enjoy this one! :)_

* * *

"**Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 9/?: Phone calls and Story telling**

**Word count: 3,062**

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_Riiiing! Riiiing! Riiiing!_

Oliver looked up from his desk to Felicity, who muttered something under her breath and declined the incoming call on her cell phone. Tilting his head to the side, he inspected her from afar, like he found himself doing more than once every day for the past couple of days. Actually, scratch that: Something he'd been doing discretely ever since he made her his EA.

Her phone had been ringing constantly this morning, something which was unusual, especially considering the fact that she usually turned her private phone off.

_Riiiing! Riiiing-_

Felicity groaned exasperatedly and either turned the phone off, or put it on silent. Oliver watched as she sighed and buried her face in her hands and took that as a cue to step out of his office and see what's wrong.

"Felicity?" he asked, walking toward her desk.

"Yes, Oliver?" she asked, her voice muffled because she hadn't lifted her face from her hands, but there was something almost playful in her tone still, which made Oliver smile.

Now _that_, was Felicity. No matter how much under distress she was, she was always trying to keep it to herself and protect the ones around her that she cared about. Oliver prided himself to be one of those people.

"Whatever it is," Oliver began, "do you want to talk about it?"

At his question, Felicity lifted her head and looked at him, quirking an eyebrow. "Is this the part in the movie where I start rambling on and on about my problems, and you, as my guy-friend sit and pretend to listen to me and then in the end tell me that everything is going to be okay?" she asked, almost in one breath.

Oliver blinked once. "_No_," he drawled, "this is where I, as your friend, actually _do _listen to you and _then_ tell you that things will be okay, because I'm certain they will be."

Felicity looked as if she made a move to look at him the way she had when they first met, when she was calling him out on his lies, but then stopped herself.

"Why don't I text Dig, see what he's up to, and tell him to get us some take-out from that Chinese place you like so much and join us for lunch?" Oliver suggested, taking his phone out and sending a message to Diggle.

"We're having lunch _here?_" Felicity asked. Oliver nodded. "With Diggle?" _Nod_. "Who is supposed to be your bodyguard and nothing else?" _Nod_. "At the office? Where anyone could suspect that we're actually more than just co-workers?"

Oliver watched her without saying a word. He waited for her to continue to question his plan, but Diggle had already replied that he would be there in twenty minutes.

"We _are_ more than co-workers, Felicity," Oliver pointed out.

A light blush crept up on her face. "Yeah, I know we're friends and all that, but you know very well about the rumors that are going around here about you and me," she whispered in annoyance. "I don't want us to add fuel to the fire," she explained.

"Is that what it's all really about? Or are you just trying to come up with excuses not to talk to me and Diggle about something that is clearly bothering you?" he quipped.

"Damn you for being so perceptive," she said, crossing her arms over her chest and sticking her tongue out like a child. "I bet that's another thing you 'learned on the Island' along with 'how to tell if something is bothering a woman,'" she snorted, turning back to her computer. She was being snappy today, which on some level, felt comforting. In a way, she was acting like she did when he did or said something which annoyed her, and he had always found that to be amusing and 'so Felicity'. Since she had shared that she was ill with them, he hadn't seen much of that side of her. It felt good to at least get a glimpse of it now, even if it was redirected at him, from whoever it was that had been calling her all day.

His phone made a sound and he looked down to read Diggle's reply. "Diggle will be here in ten minutes," he informed her, not moving from his place by her desk. "Make sure that you finish whatever you're doing until then."

When she didn't say anything, he knew that he had gotten through to her, so he walked back to his own office to shut off his computer and save whatever project he had been supposed to read up on, when Felicity had distracted him.

When he turned back around, Felicity was standing in the doorway, watching him. Something inside of him fluttered as she bit her lip and looked down for a while, but he didn't dare break the silence.

"I really don't want to talk about it," Felicity quietly said. "But I'll do it, with you and Diggle," she concluded with a small nod, almost as if she was reassuring herself that it would be fine.

"Okay," Oliver nodded, motioning for her to step inside, but she quickly shook her head.

"Can't we sit at my desk?" she asked. "I just- I need to be close to the phone. The work phone!" she clarified. Once again, Oliver only nodded as he stepped toward her. Putting a hand on her upper arm, he trailed it down to her elbow, like he used to, and led her back into her part of the office.

"Hey guys," Diggle greeted them as he walked into the office, holding a paper bag with some Chinese writing on it. "Were are we going to sit?" he asked, looking around. Without saying anything, Felicity walked over to her desk, pushed the chair in and sat down on the floor. Oliver and Diggle watched her curiously as she made herself comfortable, pulling her skirt down a little so that she wouldn't accidentally show them too much. Oliver almost chuckled, but nevertheless, without asking questions, he walked over to her and slid down to the floor next to her. They both turned to Diggle expectantly, and he offered them a small smile.

"I'll sit on the desk, if you don't mind," he said, amusement clear in his tone as he began taking out the boxes and handing them their respective order. "So, do you guys want to tell me what this is all about?" Diggle asked, raising an eyebrow at them. "Oliver texted and said that you seemed upset about something."

"Yeah," Felicity nodded. "I guess you could say that I'm a little bit upset." She opened her box and began unwrapping her chop-sticks before taking a bite of a piece of chicken. "I e-mailed my mother and told her the truth," she explained.

"You _e-mailed_ your mother?" Diggle asked, voicing Oliver's own thoughts out loud. At her statement, Oliver's mouth had gone slack and he couldn't seem to form words to ask the millions of questions that started running through his head.

Felicity had never before talked about her family, he realized, which only made the revelation that she would send an e-mail to her mother about something like a disease even more difficult to understand.

"Yeah, I sent it last week, right after the treatment was over," Felicity said. "But she has this thing about almost never checking her mail, so I'm guessing she saw it today and decided to call."

The shrug that followed, made Oliver raise his eyebrow in question. "And you've been avoiding her, because...?" he drawled. She turned her face toward him and for the first time since they sat down, Oliver noticed how close they were sitting. Their shoulders were touching and their faces were only a couple of inches apart. All he would have to do, was to lean-

Felicity looked away and the moment was broken. She cleared her throat before speaking. "My relationship with my mother hasn't been the best," she explained. "My father left us when I was just a little girl, and my mother wasn't the best at coping."

Diggle shifted on the desk he was sitting on and Oliver stayed quiet, letting Felicity know that he was listening.

"I guess you could say I never really knew him," she said, "but that doesn't mean I don't remember how much it hurt when he left. My mom, she..." Felicity trailed off, poking her food with her chop-sticks. "She started acting strange. Drinking and seeing strange men were just the beginning of our issues... I tried to look after her, and still somehow managed to get good grades in school. I remember coming home when I was sixteen and some of my friends in high school wanted to go bowling after school. I hesitated, but finally went with them, figuring that she would be fine at home. When I returned, I found her passed out in the hallway, barely breathing, so I called 911 and went with her to the hospital."

Oliver's fingers twitched and her had to take a breath. Felicity was opening up about her past, something that he had been avoiding to do every waking second that he spent with her and Diggle. Hearing her open up, made him wonder if he too one day would be able to... If it was Felicity or Diggle, he realized, he probably would one day whether he meant to or not. His two friends had that effect on him.

"My mom got a little better after that, because I think it scared her to see what she'd become," Felicity continued. "But my relationship with her was beyond repair by then. When I learned that I had been accepted into MIT, I confronted her and lashed out, telling her that she had to get a grip because dad wasn't coming back, and he would never see what had become of her. I told her that he would never be sorry for leaving us and that he wouldn't care if she ended up drinking herself to death." Felicity took a breath, and when Oliver looked at her, he noticed her eyes were brimmed with tears.

"It took a while, but my mom came to while I went to college," she took a bite from her chicken again and chewed. Oliver looked down at his own box, which he still hadn't touched, so intent on listening to Felicity. He took a big bite, careful not to spill anything on his dress-shirt.

"During my last year at MIT, my mom e-mailed me and told me she had met a pediatrician and that they had been together for a couple of months and that she was moving in with him," Felicity said. "As soon as I got a break, I went back home and visited. My mom was almost back to the way I remembered her when I was a kid, and I really like Hank too. I actually like thinking of him as my dad, since my real father was never there. My relationship with my mother has been _strange_, to say the least, and I don't think I'll ever be able to get past some of the things that happened between us," she finished. "So that's why I've been avoiding the phone all day. I can't sit here and talk to her and pretend that she cares, when I know that she'll always see me as the child of the man who left and broke her heart."

Silence filled the office.

Oliver put his own chop-sticks back in the box and held it with one hand before turning to Felicity. He put his hand on her knee, and she looked up at him, eyes still teary, which only made his heart break. "I'm sorry," he told her.

"It's not your fault, Felicity," Diggle then spoke up. "Your mother was supposed to be there for you, no matter what, and she wasn't. Oliver and I understood that something was up when you told us you hadn't spoken to your parents, but we didn't want to upset you by asking."

"We didn't want to force you to share anything that you weren't ready to share," Oliver explained, earning a low chuckle from Felicity.

"So cornering me at the office, telling me that I didn't have another choice but to talk about it isn't forcing me to share something that I wasn't ready to share?" she laughed.

"Well, I didn't know that _this_ was the issue," Oliver said seriously. "I'm sorry that I pressured you."

"It's okay, Oliver," Felicity smiled. "I feel a bit better now that I don't have to keep it inside. Honestly," she added upon seeing the look he shot her.

"I'm still sorry," he told her quietly, looking away. There was a clear change in the atmosphere around them, but he didn't want to address it. His thoughts were everywhere. He kept thinking about a younger version of Felicity, trying to get her mother to work through her issues, but at the same time getting the best notes possible in school, just so that she would be able to get away from it all.

Oliver had had his fair share or problems with his own mother while growing up. The woman hadn't always been there when he needed her, but he couldn't exactly claim that he had been the easiest kid to raise either. Whenever he had wanted something, he had always gotten it, but never appreciated it. Maybe it was because he hadn't had to fight tooth and nail for it like some other kids? How could he appreciate something if it was thrown at him just because he pointed at it?

In preschool, he had listened intently as one of the kids explained how they had had to beg their parents for weeks for that new toy that had just come out, and how proud they were when they had finally convinced them to buy it.

He himself had gotten the toy before it was even out in the store.

When he got home, he threw it away.

"Oliver?" Felicity's hand over his brought him back from his quiet walk down memory lane. He looked up at her, her face filled with worry. "Whatever you're thinking, stop," she told him. "You didn't know me back then, and even if you did, there wouldn't have been anything you could have done."

He looked up and noticed Diggle had left. "Where did Dig go?"

"He left because he got a phone call from Carly," she replied, "and don't try to change the subject, Oliver."

"I'm not blaming myself for what you went through as a kid, if that's what you're thinking," he sighed, knowing that he couldn't fight her on the matter. "You're right. I didn't know you back then, and even if I did, I wouldn't have been able to do anything."

"So what's bothering you then?" she asked, her hand still over his. Her thumb shifted, creating a featherlight brush against his knuckles which still managed to make his heart jump in his chest.

"I just never knew you grew up like that," he explained. "I would never have though..." he trailed off, clearing his throat before continuing, "I'm just sorry I pulled you into this world of darkness and danger. You've been through enough and I-"

"Oliver," she interrupted. He looked up at her again, not realizing until now that he had been avoiding to look at her. She offered him a sad smile. "I would have been going through things even if you hadn't been introduced into my life, Oliver. The only difference is that I never would have gotten to know you and Dig, so don't bother feeling sorry for introducing me to a life of 'darkness and danger', when in truth, it's probably one of the best things that has ever happened to me."

He stared at her. Then at her lips, and _God _how he wanted to just lean over and press and a light kiss to them. But it wouldn't be fair to either of them. Not now, when she was sick and he was supposed to be her friend, helping her through it.

_When she gets better_, he told himself.

He opened his mouth to speak, but clinking of heels stopped him.

"_What_ are the two of you doing on the floor?" Isabel Rochev's voice rang out. Both of them looked up at the same time. She was looking at them as if they had grown two more heads. Her eyes narrowed as she spotted the take-out boxes in their hands. "What? You needed some privacy so you decided you should get _dirty_ on the floor?" she inquired, making emphasis on 'dirty' and making sure they noticed the meaning behind her words.

Oliver glanced sideways at Felicity, who was blushing and looking like she wanted the floor to swallow her. Turning back to Isabel, he gave her a small smile. "Ms. Rochev," he said, making her look at him. "Would you please come back later, and only if it's _important_? I'm afraid I'm not available currently because I'm having lunch."

Isabel's smug look fell from her face at his words. "What do you mean you're not available? You're sitting _right here_, on the floor with your _secretary,_" she spat.

"_Executive Assistant_," he corrected, not sounding the least bothered. "And I'm eating," he wiggled the box he was holding in his hand, making a point. "So either come back later, or e-mail Ms. Smoak and schedule and appointment, like every one else in the company."

Isabel's jaw went slack for mere second, and Oliver prided himself for putting her in her place. She sent him a glare and turned around, walking out of the office without another word.

Oliver turned to look at Felicity, who was trying to hold her laughter in by covering her mouth with her hand. Oliver chuckled, and she giggled before they both broke out in laughter.

The conversation they had had before Isabel walked in was resolved as they laughed together and through their laughter, they came to a silent agreement. When Diggle walked back into the office, he smiled as he found the two of them laughing together. He didn't even ask what had happened, when he joined them with a chuckle.

* * *

_A/N: Oh, Diggle... Laughing along, despite not knowing the reason... I just love him! :)_

_I hope you enjoyed reading! We'll see if I post next week though, since the test is in the afternoon... Reviews are motivation! *wink wink* :)_

_P.S. If you have any requests after this chapter, or ideas too for that matter, please do share! :)_

_Next up, one more office chapter before the "hair trilogy" comes into play! ;)_


	10. Fatigue

_Note: Hey guys! Even though I have this massive headache, I decided to put on my glasses and post this chapter before I pass out! The test went good, I hope (!), but I really am exhausted, so hopefully, I'll have some reviews that'll cheer me up after I post this! :)_

_Enjoy!_

* * *

"**Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 10/?: Fatigue**

**Word count: 1,942**

* * *

"This has honestly been the longest morning of my life," Felicity complained as she stepped into their office. Oliver followed her closely, not knowing whether he should say something or just let her keep ranting. "I mean, Dr. Applebeam _really_ took my request for early morning treatment seriously," she continued. "By seven, I was already hooked up to the I.V!"

Oliver's stomach dropped slightly at the mention of the tubes that had been stuck in her arms, but remained silent. They had just returned from Felicity's second treatment, which had been scheduled _early_, to say the least, per Felicity's own request.

"When I said I wanted an early appointment, I didn't mean that I'd want to have to wake up at 5 Am to get ready! And then I had to drag you and Diggle out of bed too, which I still feel horrible for by the way. You really didn't have to come with me this time-"

"Felicity," Oliver interrupted as he sat down behind his desk. He shot her a look and shook his head lightly. "Diggle and I didn't mind waking up early."

Felicity shrugged, pushing her glasses up on her nose, handing him a stack of papers to sign. "Still, you were out all night and Diggle has been watching A.J these last few nights because Carly keeps getting the night-shift. You need your rest you know," she scolded.

"You know, you don't have to baby us," Oliver pointed out. Felicity rolled her eyes as a reply and then motioned to the papers.

"Sign here, here and here," she said, pointing at three particular lines. Oliver followed her order without question before taking a long look at her. She was looking quite pale and had dark rings underneath her eyes.

"Maybe you should lay down a bit?" Oliver suggested. "Rest."

"I'm fine, Oliver," she said, offering him yet another smile.

"You sure? The doctor said you might be feeling a bit tired," he frowned. "It might be better for you to take the rest of the day off. I can handle things here by myself."

"No offense, Oliver," she laughed, "but I don't think you'd be able to find your stapler without me."

"That's ridiculous," he scoffed. "It's right..." he trailed off, looking at his desk, lifting a few papers. He looked up at Felicity, who moved a folder and picked up the stapler in triumph.

"It's okay, Oliver," she smiled. "You might be good at shooting arrows, but working in an office isn't really your strong suit." Handing him the stapler, she turned on her heel and started walking back to her own desk. "I'll be out here if you need me," she called over her shoulder.

He popped his head up on his hand and watched her leave. She was very good at hiding the fact that she was exhausted, but he was even better at seeing right through her facade.

Despite the early scheduled appointment, Felicity had tried to be as alert as possible. Dr. Applebeam had been pleased to see that she was feeling okay. When she'd shared that she hadn't felt any pain for the last week and a half, he wondered how often she _had_ been hurting but hadn't said anything about it. Just like everything else in this entire situation, the though made his stomach flip, and not in a good way.

An hour passed and Felicity was still typing away on her computer and taking calls. Oliver was looking over a new contract and glancing up at her every once in a while to see what she was doing. It wasn't until yet another half hour that he noticed the change.

Her cheeks were slightly red and she was sitting a little more upright, almost as if she was trying to force herself to stay awake by stretching. He took this as his cue to check on her.

"Felicity? You doing okay?" he asked as he stepped toward her desk. She looked up at him from her desk and nodded while humming. "You sure? Because you look like you can't keep your eyes open," he pointed out, earning a small groan from her.

"I'm sorry," she sighed. "I just, I've tried my best to keep busy but... I really am tired."

"That's nothing to apologize for, Felicity," Oliver shook his head, standing behind her, putting his hands on her shoulders. He gave her a small squeeze and she leaned back her head and looked up at him, her eyes droopy. "Do you want me to call Diggle and ask him to drive you home?"

"No," Felicity protested, shaking her head lightly.

"Do you want to lay down on the couch in my office?" he suggested next and she shrugged before nodding once. He lifted his hands from her shoulders to let her stand up and she followed him back to his office and laid down on the leather couch. He removed his suit jacket and covered her upper body with it before removing her glasses and putting them on the small table next to the couch.

"You'll wake me in twenty minutes, okay?" Felicity ordered, her eyes already closing. "If I sleep longer than that, I won't be able to pull myself together for another three hours because I've gotten too much sleep."

"I got it," Oliver nodded. "Twenty minutes." He leaned down, but stopped himself as he realized that he had been about to press his lips to hers. When he heard her soft snore, he sighed deeply and shook his head at his own stupidity before pressing a light kiss to her forehead. He stepped away from her now unconscious form and sat behind his desk again.

He watched her for the twenty minutes she had allowed herself to rest, wondering how she would have reacted if he really had kissed her. Would she have been mad at him, or had the fatigue already taken over and pulled her into unconsciousness so that she wouldn't even have felt it? Would she have liked it...?

Gently, he brushed his fingers along her cheek. "Felicity," he whispered, putting his hand on her shoulder next. "Wake up."

"Mm..." she hummed, her nose scrunching in a way that warmed Oliver's heart.

"You told me twenty minutes," Oliver reminded her. "It's been twenty-five and I'm afraid of what you might do to me if I let you sleep for another five."

"I have a hard time believing that The Arrow would be afraid of a small, blonde, IT-girl," she mumbled, not opening her eyes yet.

"You have a really scary loud-voice," Oliver chuckled. "Trust me on that one."

Her eyes opened and she smiled up at him slightly. "Thank you," she said.

"For what?" he smiled back.

"For acknowledging that my loud-voice _is_ scary and for watching over me as I slept."

She sat up on the couch, still keeping his jacket wrapped around her shoulders. He looked at her warily.

"Are you sure you don't want to go home?" he asked. "You really do look tired."

"I'm absolutely positive that I don't want to go home, Oliver," Felicity replied, almost making Oliver groan.

"Why do you have to be so stubborn?" he asked her, but she shook her head.

"It's not stubbornness, Oliver," she told him. "It's just that, I'll be feeling tired _a lot_ after receiving the chemo and the radiation. Dr. Applebeam confirmed that today when I asked him about the fatigue I was feeling. I can't just go home whenever I feel that I'm tired, because then I would probably be at home all the time, and I don't want that," she explained. "I have my job here at Queen Consolidated and I've got our night job too. I can't just leave it all behind because I'm falling asleep half the time."

Oliver could hear the logic in what she was saying, but that didn't necessarily mean that he enjoyed watching Felicity struggle to stay awake when she so clearly needed rest. However, the power nap she had just taken seemed to have done it's job since she was looking more alert than she was before.

"How about this then," Oliver began. "Whenever you feel tired, not matter what time of the day it is, you just walk right in here and lay down and I'll keep an eye on the clock for you?" he suggested.

"Sounds like a good plan," she nodded. "And if the phone rings? What am I supposed to do if I'm asleep?"

"Let it ring," Oliver shrugged. "If it's important, they'll call back."

There was a long pause as she seemed to struggle to find some other hole in his plan. Of course, she pointed out that he wouldn't be able to wake her if he was in a meeting, but he reminded her that she actually did have a perfectly functional phone and that she knew how to work the alarm on it. He playfully suggested they record his voice so that it would actually be him waking her up, but she only laughed and smacked his arm lightly.

"Okay, you've got it all figured out," she smiled. "And when we're down in the Foundry, in the middle of a mission, I'll try to stay alert."

"That only means that you'll have to rest a couple of hours before you get there, which you'll be able to do if you don't stick around here and work overtime with me all the time," he pointed out.

"You need me here," she said.

"I do," he nodded, "but I can handle it. As long as you're feeling okay, I'll be fine. I can even ask Diggle to keep me company. I mean, he hangs out in the coffee room most of the time anyway, since he's supposed to be my bodyguard as well."

She laughed, shaking her head, "I totally just got the image of Diggle dressed as me, trying to do my job in my head," she told him.

"That's an image I didn't need," he chortled. He looked down and for the first time he noticed that he was crouching down in front of her as she sat on the couch, his hands wrapped around hers. Looking up to meet her eyes, he noticed that she'd been looking down as well and the proof was the small blush that began creeping its way up on her cheeks.

"Well," she cleared her throat. "I think we have settled the issue of handling my tiredness," she said, removing her hands from his grip. He stood up and she followed shortly after, wiping her hands against the skirt she was wearing. Oliver didn't know what to think of it. Had she too been overwhelmed by the realization that they had been holding hands once again without even noticing it?

"Just like we'll handle everything else," he said, trying to steer clear of any thoughts that would lead him to thinking about his growing affections for his friend. "Together."

She offered him another smile as she removed his jacket from her shoulders and helped him put it on again before brushing it lightly at his shoulders, trying to straighten it. He inhaled, feeling a hint of her perfume still lingering on the piece of clothing.

"Together," she agreed, wrapping her arms around him in a tight hug.

When he hugged her back, he wondered if the embrace was giving her just as much comfort as it was giving him, because for some reason, he felt like he had needed it more than she had, and that she had known it before he had figured it out himself.

* * *

_Note: __Okay, so I just wanna put it out there that I wrote this chapter like three weeks ago and I was REALLY annoyed when Oliver and Sara had a similar moment in last weeks episode! Still, I didn't want to change the "together" part because as I said, I had written it long before and was quite happy with it... So yeah..._

_I hope you liked it though! Now I'm off to take some painkillers and then I'm going to bed! Class tomorrow!_  
_Thank you for reading! Reviews are always welcome, as are requests! ;)_


	11. Cut

_Note: Part 1 of the Hair Trilogy. These three chapters will take place back-to-back, in approximately 48 hours._

_Hey guys! Sorry for being so late with this chapter, but I've had a lot going on! I still haven't been able to finish the next part, even though I have it all planned out! But hopefully, I'll be able to write more tomorrow, so I'll finish the trilogy during the weekend and you'll get the next chapter as planned! :) Please enjoy this one, and I hope it gives you as many feels as it gave me while I wrote it! ;)_

* * *

"**Crumbled Papers"**

**Chapter 11/?: Cut**

**Word count: 1,981**

* * *

Oliver slumped into the armchair in his living room, sighing deeply before closing his eyes. It had been a long day at the office and he felt like he could really use a night off from the Arrow-business. Diggle had offered to patrol tonight and since they weren't exactly working on any cases, Oliver had agreed to let him do so. Normally, he would have thought twice about it, but considering that he hadn't been sleeping _at all_ since he found out about Felicity's illness, he had given in to his tiredness without hesitation. He wouldn't be any good fighting criminals if he was barely able to keep himself awake and he most certainly wouldn't be of any use to Felicity if he fell asleep while she was on a general check-up.

It had been two days ago, when Felicity had been called in by Dr. Applebeam to take some blood samples and run some tests that he had felt himself be gently woken up by Diggle's hand on his shoulder. He had been confused at first, but jumped to his feet when he noticed that Felicity wasn't there. Diggle had had to explain to him that Felicity was off getting an x-ray and that she would be back in fifteen minutes before he could actually calm down.

"You're exhausted man," Diggle had pointed out and Oliver had only brushed it off with a shrug then.

Now, two days later, he had fallen asleep during a board meeting, which had earned him a scolding from Isabel, who clearly still wasn't over their last encounter when he had told her he wasn't available. Felicity had looked at him worriedly and later asked him if he was okay, but he had only told her that he was a little tired. It bemused him slightly, the way she worried about him, when he was in fact the one that should be worrying about her- which he _was._The fact that Felicity was still intent on thinking about others rather than only focusing on herself and fighting her disease only fueled the way he felt about her.

She truly was remarkable.

Every day Oliver tried hard to push away all the feelings he held for her that were anything but platonic friendship, but he couldn't deny that the woman had come to mean something _more _to him than he had first intended to.

His phone interrupted his thoughts and he picked up without even thinking when he recognized the ring tone that Felicity had set for her own contact after she hijacked his phone one day.

"Felicity?" Oliver answered, only to hear erratic breaths on the other line. "Felicity!"

"_Oliver... I..._" Felicity's voice was panicked and instantly, he rose from his seat.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "Are you home? Has something happened?" His questions seemed to blur together because of the speed he was speaking in.

"_Please, just, come to my house. Please, I- I know Diggle is out patrolling and I- I need someone_," she whispered.

"I'll be there in five minutes," he said, already pulling on his jacket as he waited for her reply.

"_Okay__._"

It was a silent reply, but at least it was there, which reassured him that she hadn't fainted or anything. She didn't comment on how the mansion was at least fifteen minutes away from her house and that it would be impossible for him to reach her in five minutes.

He got there in seven, breaking multiple traffic rules and knocked on her door frantically, calling out her name while he did. The lock turned and Felicity opened the door, looking at him with wide eyes and for a moment, they only stood there, watching each other.

While she had sounded upset over the phone, he couldn't see any sign of her crying, which calmed him a bit. She stood in the door, silently and he gave her another once over, noticing that she was wearing her pajamas, which meant that she had clearly been getting ready to go to bed.

"Can I come in?" he asked and she seemed to wake from her daze, nodding and stepping aside. "You sounded upset over the phone. Is everything okay?"

She blinked, "Everything is normal." He watched her curiously. What a strange thing to say...

Felicity shook her head and locked the door before walking toward her living room. "I mean, I talked to Dr. Applebeam about this the other day and he said it was normal, which I already knew, but that doesn't mean it didn't absolutely _shock _me when I noticed," she ranted, pacing in front of him.

"Felicity, what's wrong?" he inquired, forcing her to stop by putting his hands on her shoulders. She stopped talking and stared at him with wide eyes before taking a step back from him. Oliver's stomach clenched. Why was she pushing him away now?

"As I said, it's normal," she mumbled, before running her fingers through her hair. Oliver watched her quietly as she then proceeded to hold her hand out to him. Long strands of blonde hair were stuck between her fingers. He watched as she once again ran her other hand through her hair and then held it out, with the same result. "My hair," she said, her voice shaky. "It's falling off."

It was clear that she was trying to hold it together as the reality of her situation finally seemed to sink in. Oliver swallowed thickly before taking a step toward her. He took her hands in his and removed the hair from them before moving his hands to cup her cheeks, forcing her to look up at him. His breath almost caught in his throat when he realized just how close they were standing. She placed her hands over his and closed her eyes for a moment and he couldn't help but wonder what she was thinking.

"What do you want to do?"

His question was unanswered for a minute and he took the opportunity to gently touch the blonde tresses of hair that were framing her face. Despite the fact that she hadn't washed it today, it smelled wonderfully and was incredibly soft, just like he imagined it would be.

"Will you help me?" she asked, bringing him back from his deep thoughts.

"What?"

"Will you help me cut it off?" she repeated, her voice a mere whisper.

His fingers wrapped around a curl and he absentmindedly twirled it around his finger. "Are you sure this is what you want?"

"It's falling off, Oliver," she said, opening her eyes to look at him. "I think it'll only be worse to watch it happen slowly and it will be very inconvenient if it happens all the time around the office..."

He offered her a small smile, "If it's what you want, I'll do it."

"Thank you," she said, her lips curling up as well. "Besides, it'll grow back, right? When I'm better?" Her voice was filled with hope but at the same time held something else as well that Oliver couldn't quite put his finger on.

"It'll grow back," he nodded, his thumbs stroking her cheeks gingerly.

"Then let's do this," she nodded, determination evident in her tone. She took a step back from him and grabbed his hand, dragging him with her to the bathroom.

It was very... _Felicity_, with pink towels and soaps and perfume bottles and small decorative ducks by the bathtub. She had prepared for what was about to happen, Oliver noticed, since she had already put a pair of scissors and an electronic shaver on the toilet seat.

"You'll have to cut it with the scissors first," she explained, "and then you'll have to shave it off. Actually, let me cut it with the scissors, or do you think it'll be better if you just stand there for moral support while I do it all by myself? Maybe if we-"

"_Felicity_," he said calmly, putting his hand on her shoulder. She inhaled sharply and let out a deep breath while she stared at herself in the mirror. Slowly, she turned to look at him. "You can cut it with the scissors and then I'll help you with shaving the rest off." It pained him to say it out loud, but he tried to get a hold of his own emotions, for her sake.

"Okay," she said. "Will you hand me the scissors?" He reached for the tool and when he lifted it, it felt heavier than it was supposed to feel. He swallowed thickly and handed them to her. She took them and lifted a piece of her hair but she seemed to hesitate. Oliver took a chance and reached for her hand. Slowly, he made her let go of her hair and then replaced her hand with his, holding up the strand for her. Their eyes met through the mirror and she smiled at him.

The lock of hair fell down into the sink and Oliver exhaled, picking up another strand for her. She cut that one as well and let out a small laugh.

"I've always wondered what I would look like in short hair," she breathed.

"Now you'll find out," he said, holding up another piece of hair.

She let out another laugh, but this time, it was quickly followed by a tear trailing down her cheek. Oliver wiped it away with his thumb. "It'll grow back, Felicity," he tried to soothe her.

"I know, I know," she said, cutting yet another piece off. "It'll grow back," she told herself. More tears sprang from her eyes and Oliver swallowed a lump that had formed in his own throat.

Soon enough, the long tresses were all cut off, leaving only a mop of blonde hair on top of her head. Felicity's shoulders were shaking from a mixture of laughter and crying. She dropped the scissors into the sink and turned around so quickly that Oliver barely had time to catch her. Burying her head in his chest, she clutched to his shirt as a sob racked her body. He held on to her just as tightly, if not more. Her hands wrapped around his waist as he pulled away and cupped her face, making her look into his eyes.

"It'll grow back," he reassured her, pressing a kiss to her forehead. She nodded and sniffed, telling him to cut the rest off.

Later, they sat down on her couch, a pint of mint chocolate ice-cream being passed between them as they wondered what Diggle's reaction would be when he saw her later. She told him she would wrap a pink scarf around her head, but that she would probably need to go shopping to find some nice colors so that she could match her dresses and also go wig-shopping. He told her they would take a day off from the office so they could do all of that together.

Felicity blushed lightly and then brushed her hand over her now bald head, pushing the glasses up on her nose. "It kind of feels better now," she admitted, a small smile on her face. "Better than seeing it fall off slowly every day."

"It looks good on you," Oliver told her, putting his spoon in his mouth before reaching over. He ran his own hand over the newly revealed skin and smiled. "And you're right, it's better this way, at least for now."

She leaned into his hand as it fell to her cheek, his thumb brushing over her cheekbone. He gave her yet another reassuring smile as he offered her the ice-cream, "And it will all grow back too, when you get better and it will be just as healthy as you'll be."

"Thank you for being here, Oliver," she smiled at him.

"I'll always be here for you, Felicity," he told her. "Every step of the way."

* * *

_Note: Like it, hate it? Review and let me know! It gives me motivation to write! :)_


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